“Attack in LA” is a Nihilistic Skullfuck That Everyone Needs to See

by Bob Freville

Inspired by John’s Colter’s Run, Attack in LA (formerly Parasites) is a harsh take on class war, culture shock, homelessness and blind hatred. Written and directed by our friend Chad Ferrin (the filmmaker behind Breaking Glass Pictures’ legendary cult horror epic Someone’s Knocking at the Door and the man at the helm of the forthcoming splatter comedy Exorcism at 60,000 Feet), ‘AiLA’ tells the story of three privileged friends who find themselves stranded on Skid Row after their luxury car gets a flat tire.

Of course, the plot is far more complex than all that; once you get past the amateurish and inaccurate cover art that suggests a triumphant uprising of the proletariat via assault rifles, you find yourself in an immersive picture where you are running right alongside the film’s terrified protagonist.

To say that Attack in LA is gritty would not be a fair description since critics hurl that word around so much that it’s lost all meaning. A better summation would be to say that Attack in LA looks and feels like a swim through a kiddie pool full of someone else’s sick…and that kiddie pool is brimming with syringes, spiked boards and piss.

The story follows Marshal Colter (newcomer Sean Samuels) as he and his pals are subject to a forcible search and seizure by a cadre of cruddy street people who live in the tunnels of Downtown Los Angeles.

Although it’s unlikely, we get the impression early on that Marshal and his friends might get off with little more than a protracted scare from these hobos and some soiled pairs of undies…if they could just keep their elitist opinions to themselves. Naturally, that’s not what happens.

I won’t spoil the details, but suffice it to say that things go sideways fast after their corpulent Frat boy friend Scottie (Sebastian Fernandez) runs off at the mouth and gets that mouth filled with more than he could have anticipated.

I’ve long loved flicks that explore the crazy shit that can happen when the average worker drones are asleep. Whether we’re talkin’ about Scorsese’s sublime and surreal After Hours, Joe Carnahan’s retro throwback Stretch or the 1993 urban crime thriller Judgment Night, the most exciting stories almost always occur after the sun goes into hiding.

Such is the case with Attack in LA, a sort of Judgment Night reboot that’s a more overt meditation on the caste system and racial politics. This might be Ferrin’s most fully realized picture and, certainly, his only film with a clear message—Be careful holding yourself in higher regards than others because you might end up in their position.

On a fundamental level, this movie is a classic story of a war waged between Good and Evil, except in this case “good” is an entitled, well-educated young black man and “evil” is an addle-brained old war veteran ironically named Wilco. The curmudgeonly vagrant is played with grimy vigor by the chameleon-like character actor Robert Miano (Donnie Brasco, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine).

This pic is as ugly and nihilistic as most of its director’s canon, but it may also be his most beautifully shot and well-executed. That it was relegated to Amazon Prime without any proper fanfare is a crime worse than anything committed in its brief running time.

What we see as the film progresses is the sheer prevalence of abuse that people in the so-called underclass take and the “lows” that the privileged are willing to stoop to when they are put under pressure for the first time.

Ferrin’s choice to feature extensive full frontal male nudity was something I would have automatically applauded as someone who recognizes that the film industry has been both exploitative and hypocritical when it comes to gratuitous female nudity for far too long, but I applaud it here because I think he had a deeper reason for doing so.

So far as I can tell, Ferrin is saying that it doesn’t matter if you have a big, swinging dick…even if you’re packing a fucking war club between your legs there will always be someone out there ready to cut you down to size.

From a purely narrative standpoint, the filmmakers definitely owe a debt to John Carpenter’s cult actioner Assault on Precinct 13, but the gravity with which each kill is depicted owes more to Jean-François Richet’s 2005 remake of the same.

None of this is to say that Attack in LA is unoriginal; the picture’s unflinching treatment of the subject matter is something that is rarely seen in film today and in Ferrin’s hands it is presented with stark clarity. While the cinematography can be as dizzying as running for your life the picture is as sobering as brass knuckles to a drunken head.

The soundtrack is fire from the synth score to the incredibly subtle but totally on the nose cover songs (“House of the Rising Sun,” et al.) all the way down to the third act’s haunting originals.

What ‘Attack’ shows us more than anything is the importance of acceptance. Were it not for one unnecessary and badly timed comment the three boys central to the film’s first act would likely be okay. Nothing inflames more than ignorance. The sequence in which our protagonist is mistaken for a homeless person and is subject to a paint balling attack by millennial vloggers is painfully reminiscent of the Bum Wars craze.

The racism of Attack is nothing new, of course, but it seems particularly striking in 2019. Without getting at all political on the subject, I can say with some semblance of authority that the reason behind that racism is clear—the self-appointed messiah of these mole people is a man who was all too happy to be lord and personal savior to his fellow hobos. Once they questioned his instincts they became what they always really were in his eyes—“bitches,” “cunts,” “gooks,” “Taco eaters,” etc.

‘Attack’ has the ending that Get Out should have had, the kind of ending that doesn’t satisfy but pisses people off. And that’s saying something in an age where everyone plays it safe.

‘Cynthia’ is a Surprisingly Touching Horror-Comedy

“Cynthia” (2018) DVD Review

by Bob Freville

Those of us who were alive during the latter half of the 20th century can remember a time when babies were the focus of a wave of excellent and, oftentimes, atrocious horror movies. 1974’s It’s Alive!, 1982’s Basket Case and the respective follow-ups to each of those titles introduced us to the perils of postpartum aggression and fetal abomination long before antinatalism penetrated pop culture.

Like Larry Cohen and Frank Henenlotter before them, writer/producer Robert Rhine and co-directors Devon Downs & Kenny Gage mine parenthood and pregnancy for satire. One would think that Cynthia‘s indie budget and the relative inexperience of the above the line creative team would result in a sub-par rip-off of the aforementioned films. Instead, they make it work to their advantage by going their own way.

This is not another tired bad seed movie of the kind that Hollywood keeps churning out. Rather it is a raucous dark comedy with heart that masquerades as an exploitation horror movie. Sure, an ancillary character is disemboweled mid-coitus and yes, a stark naked victim thinks nothing of attempting to escape from her predator with her tits out and her underwear hanging off…in a professional setting.

But Cynthia is much more than some bloody B-movie, it is a well-written and well-acted tragedy of sorts, a picture which spends more time on the human condition than it does on creature effects or bloodshed.

Halloween‘s Scout Taylor-Compton and Masters of Sex’s Kyle Jones are a young couple who have been struggling for some time to get preggers. After repeated fertility treatments fail, they are shocked to find that their very last shot took. They are going to have a baby at long last…but their baby has some odd company in the womb.

Their unborn child’s companion is eager to greet the world and it’ll stop at nothing to be with its new family. What follows is something quite different than what most viewers will be expecting.

The film is at its best when it’s lampooning the idiotic and selfish reasons why certain people want to have children. It also deftly explores the frustratingly clinical approach many couples take in order to bear fruit, so to speak.

The best scenes in Cynthia have little to do with what most die hard horror fans would consider the hallmarks of the genre. Robert Rhine hands in a script brimming with memorable dialogue, brilliant transitions and likable characters…even when they are being absolute shits.

What pic manages to illustrate is just how easily humans can disregard each others’ feelings when it comes to satiating their own desires and needs. Nowhere is this more clear than in the way the filmmakers make us empathize with the flick’s negligent father-to-be.

Earlier I mentioned antinatalism, but it bears mentioning again since Cynthia may be the first of the mutant baby movies to properly elucidate the suffering of the child who didn’t ask to be born. When Taylor-Compton’s Robin goes looking for her missing infant daughter in an air vent and discovers her with the hideously deformed Cynthia, her mutated offspring lets out a guttural whimper that effectively conveys the agony and yearning which are our birthright as humans.

If genre fans need added incentive to see Cynthia they can count on the always game Bill motherfuckin’ Moseley (Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2, House of 1,000 Corpses) for a bizarre cross-dressing cameo and Moseley’s Devil’s Rejects co-star Sid Haig as a sleazy cop to rival most of the grotty punks he played in the Seventies.

Check this picture out today if you like genre films that have more on their mind than gore and one-dimensional throwaway victims. If I was prone to giving things a rating, this one would easily earn four bloody diapers.

You can watch Cynthia now on DVD and Prime Streaming.

Zebra Summer—Item #3: Chain Letter by Ruby Jean Jensen

In Zebra Summer, Zakary McGaha (author of Locker Arms and Soothing the Savage Swamp Beast), chronicles a very specific portion of his summer reading-schedule: horror novels published by Zebra Books.

I’m a fan of Ruby Jean Jensen; several of her books are among my favorite horror novels in general (which is no easy feat). Sometimes, though…she just misses the mark.

You know an RJJ novel is going to be bad when you recognize her formula right away. In this case, I knew within the first couple of pages in the first chapter (not the prologue) that it was gonna be a clunker.

Fair enough: most, if not all, of Ruby’s books are about kids in dire situations, but this, sadly, allowed her…or forced her, if my suppositions of Zebra editor overlords is correct…into a rut that got super-tiresome. Although none of these books follow the exact same plot, they’re all too similar in my opinion: Wait and See, Jump Rope, Lost and Found, Victoria, and the novel in question: Chain Letter.

All of Ruby’s good novels… Home Sweet Home, Celia, and Annabelle…involve children, as well, but they feel like their own books…they feel like they were written with actual passion, instead of simply churned out, one after the other, in factory-line fashion.

Chain Letter is an okay read, but it pales in comparison to the novels mentioned above. I’ve already forgotten most of it, because, sadly, there wasn’t anything worth remembering…except for what might be the funniest ending in pulp-horror history.

The ending actually made me laugh out loud. I can’t say whether I think it was intentional or not, but damn: it made the book worth reading.

The novel is about a couple of kids who find a chain letter in an abandoned retirement-home/asylum…which sounds like a fun place to wind up in…and then proceed to bumble around while bad things happen to them and their families because they don’t follow the instructions to a tee. Their lives are further complicated because half the letter is missing!

As in all of Jensen’s formulaic works (as opposed to her good ones), some of the kids make it and some don’t. Nothing particularly surprising or inventive happens in this regard; Chain Letter is no exception.

The novel’s principle flaw involves the stale plot that meanders about at Christmas’s pace. Everything you expect to happen does, and it takes forever at that…this excludes the amazing ending, of course…and absolutely nothing cool happens concerning the supernatural aspect of the story. There were multiple ways the book could’ve been made at least cool, but I suppose it wasn’t meant to be.

Perhaps I would’ve enjoyed the novel had I not been familiar with Jensen’s other works. You may be wondering why I continue to read this author if I dislike her “formula” so dearly, but trust me: when she doesn’t follow it, she’s AMAZING.

There’s been talk of Ruby’s books coming back into print in ebook form…there’s a new website and everything; the domain name is simply her name plus a dot and a com…and I seriously hope this happens. All of her books are worth reading, in my opinion, even if some are better than others.

It’s about time her work became easily accessible. Horror fans shouldn’t be deprived.

As far as my “rating” for Chain Letter goes…I’m thinking 3/5. It was at least readable, and some parts kept me glued to the pages. Originally, I gave the book 5/5 on Goodreads, but that’s only because I was still laughing at the ending.

If you’re like me…a mega fan of ole RJJ…then you’re going to read this book anyway. If you’re a horror fan who’s just now getting to RJJ, I’d say go for one of the novels I mentioned above as being her best.

After that, read this one to put an end to your suspense concerning the hilarious ending.

Zebra Summer Item #2—Deadly Nature by V.M. Thompson

Book Review by Zakary McGaha

In Zebra Summer, Zakary McGaha (author of Locker Arms and Soothing the Savage Swamp Beast), chronicles a very specific portion of his summer reading schedule: horror novels published by Zebra Books.

For my second installment of Zebra Summer, I’m going to be discussing a book that, for the most part, I’ve already forgotten.

That’s not to say that it was a bad novel…there was just too much meaningless stuff thrown around the story. For me to say that is weird, however. I love flowery writing; I love detail; I HATE minimalism, except in rare cases.

I’m a Faulkner type of dude, as opposed to a Hemingway one.

Anyway, Deadly Nature by V.M. Thompson, who wrote a total of four books for Zebra (with the last two under the pseudonym T.J. Kirby) is a novel that has a lot of great things going for it, but it’s simply too long.

Once, in high school, I attempted to read this sucker, but ended up trading it in before finishing it. Flash forward to now, and I managed to get…and I’m ninety-nine percent sure of this…the SAME copy back from the same bookstore.

I couldn’t stay away from it. The qualities in it that are good drew me back.

Upon finishing it, I was actually satisfied. It’s flawed in many ways, but it’s fits the so-bad-it’s-good cliché to a tee…except for the fact that it takes a lot of time to get through.

I found myself not wanting to read it while I was reading it, and that’s because so much time is spent on Leave it to Beaver shit: this novel has sentimentality oozing from every page (even the ones where mutant animals are attacking people).

Small-town horror isn’t for everyone, because, in a lot of ways, it isn’t realistic. But, in another way, that draws people to it. The quaintness of the lives of the simple, small-town characters that populate these types of novels make for either: a). a cozy reading experience, or b). a fucking boring one. I’ve experienced both within this subgenre, and, as you’ve probably guessed, I’d say Deadly Nature falls into the latter category, although it has some shining moments.

Without spoiling anything, I will say that the “quaintness” of these characters’ lives definitely doesn’t prepare them for the horror that awaits them, but to say V.M. Thompson overdid it would be an understatement. You could easily excise every quaint passage from this book, and you’d have a whole novel, albeit a boring one, with the rest left over as a short story.

The “scary” parts of this novel are pretty good, although for a long time they’re underplayed, but this didn’t necessarily bother me. I love extreme horror, but I also love quiet horror. I’ve read novels with a lot less “action” than Deadly Nature and have loved them, because their other, more cognitive qualities superseded anything that mere “action” could have achieved. The problem, then, with Deadly Nature, is that there simply isn’t anything else to sink your canines into.

Deadly Nature is a novel full of fluff, in other words. Too much of nothing is going on. The small themes that do exist (Them sceintists better not mess with nature, because they might create somethin’ that they don’t want and that’s evil) would have been fine, had the story been fun, but it’s too bogged down with, as mentioned, nothing.

That’s not to say that the novel is unreadable, though. It simply takes patience. When things do get going, they get going pretty heavily. The good stuff that is there makes me want to read this author’s other stuff. This is the first novel V.M. Thompson published, so I’m sure there’s some improvement to be seen.

2.5/5 stars.

Be sure to check back for the next installment. You can’t talk about Zebra without discussing Ruby Jean Jensen! Stay tuned…

Zebra Summer—Item #1: Runaway by Stephen Gresham

In Zebra Summer, Zakary McGaha (author of Locker Arms and Soothing the Savage Swamp Beast) chronicles a very specific portion of his summer reading schedule: horror novels published by Zebra Books.

Most people don’t need to be introduced to Zebra Books as they’ve already been familiarized with them through Paperbacks From Hell, Will Erickson’s blog, etc. Zebra is the publisher with all the skeletons on their covers; Zebra is the 80s horror boom all rolled up into one publisher: a ton of so-so books with GREAT covers, mixed in with a few literary treasures. If you’re looking to be dazzled by importance, don’t read Zebra novels. Only read them if you want: a) a trashy horror fix, b) an authentic 80s or early 90s fix, and/or c) both.

I’ve been collecting Zebra novels since high school, so it was slightly before everyone jumped on the nostalgia bandwagon. Therefore, I bought most of them before they became expensive collector’s items.

Without a doubt, I have more Zebra-specific books in my library than books from any other publisher, however I haven’t read most of them. The fact of the matter is, I can’t read too many at one time. They just aren’t good: they’re uniformly written at a level that can only be described as in between adult and YA. My theory is that most Zebra authors were either pressured to write for kids just as much as adults, or Zebra’s editors had multiple field days.

Despite what I just said, Zebra novels are very charming when they’re read in the right light…preferably a soft orange or yellow (none of that harsh, white fluorescent shit). They’re also charming if you read them while in a sentimental frame of mind. Cozy small towns? Check. Old cars? Check. Antiques? On more than one occasion. Think of the Thorn trilogy in the Halloween franchise. That’s what Zebra books mean to me.

This summer, I happen to be in a very sentimental frame of mind, so I’m gonna read a ton of these forgotten, oftentimes bastardized (written for moolah) books.

First up is Runaway by Stephen Gresham.

Gresham is an author I’ve always enjoyed; I also think he’s been unfairly shat on, although, like every writer, some of his books are better than others. Runaway, to my delight, was one of his better ones.

This one centers on a young, rich lad who runs away from his upscale, beach town life because his parents are career-obsessed, money-grubbing scoundrels…which is how most people in the 80s were, if I’m to believe everything I’ve read.

In ‘Texas Chainsaw’ fashion, he winds up with a family…of sorts…that is comprised entirely of whackos, save for all the other runaways like him.

Said family is actually a shelter for homeless kids, and it’s run by religious nutjobs who are somewhat, and this isn’t a spoiler, manipulated by dark, supernatural forces as well as the usual human vice of power-lust.

Pretty much every character in this book was compelling; I wanted to keep reading about all of them…especially the runaways who are put in some pretty dire situations.

Runaway takes your typical “child in peril” Zebra plot and amps it up quite a bit. Usually, Ruby Jean Jensen is the one putting kids through the wringer, but damn! Gresham gives her a run for her money with this ‘un.

In most cases, I finish Zebra novels at a sluggish pace, because that’s how they’re written. But I finished this one in good time, despite its above average length for a Zebra book.

Do yourself a favor and pick this novel up. Sadly, there’s never a knife-wielding skeleton emerging for a gingerbread house between the covers of Runaway, but that hardly matters because what is between the covers is pretty awesome.

I would also like to take a second to recommend my favorite book by Stephen Gresham, Rockabye Baby. It, along with several of Gresham’s novels, has been re-released in ebook form.

For my next installment of Zebra Summer, I will review Deadly Nature by V.M. Thompson.